Why Your Identity Crisis Might Be Your Greatest Gift

I hope this week’s message finds you well.

Been pondering a lot about all the things we find ourselves drawn to.

As long as I can remember I’ve been drawn to Japanese culture. It’s always appealed to me —the philosophies, design, spiritual practices, and overall aesthetic.

There's a Japanese art called Kintsugi—the practice of mending broken pottery with gold. Instead of hiding the cracks, the breaks become the most beautiful part of the piece. More valuable. More resilient. More honest.

I've been thinking about this as I watch so many of us struggle with the question: "Who am I becoming? And how can I conceal all of my cracks?”

The Uncomfortable Truth About Transformation

Here's what no one tells you about self-improvement: the person you're becoming will make the person you are today feel deeply uncomfortable.

We talk about growth like it's additive—collecting better habits, stacking morning routines. But real transformation? It's subtractive. It's about shedding the stories that no longer serve you, even when those stories feel like home.

This is why your identity crisis isn't a detour—it's the destination.

The Three Stages of Profound Change

The Crack: Something breaks. A relationship, a job, a belief. You might call it a breakdown, but what if it's actually a breakthrough?

“Your setback ain’t nothing, but a setup for a comeback.” Anonymous

The Void: That uncomfortable space between who you were and who you're becoming. Most people panic here and rush back to familiar patterns. But this is sacred ground where possibility lives.

The Golden Repair: You rebuild, but not the same. You integrate the breaks, the lessons, the scars. You become stronger at the broken places.

Your Relationship with Yourself Is Everything

Everything else flows from this one source: how you relate to yourself when no one else is watching.

Are you kind to yourself during the void? Do you honor your need for professional support when transformation feels overwhelming? Do you create rituals that remind you of your worth—whether through meditation practice, journaling, or simply paying attention to what your body needs for rest and restoration?

The Question That Changes Everything

Instead of asking "What should I do?" try asking: "Who do I need to become to live the life I'm being called toward?"

This question demands honesty. It asks you to consider what you'll need to release, what support you'll need to gather, what environment you'll need to create.

This Week’s Challenge

Choose one story you tell about yourself that feels true but limiting. Write it down.

Then write: "What if this wasn't the whole truth about me?"

Notice what comes up. The goal isn't to become someone else—it's to become more fully yourself, including the parts you've been afraid to claim.

What's resonating with you right now? Hit reply—I read every response.

With love and unwavering belief in your becoming, 

Sue

P.S. - Transformation isn't a solo journey. The support systems you choose become part of your golden repair.

P.S.S. - Resources To Explore

How To Do A Mental Detox

Sharing Vulnerability

This week’s newsletter is sponsored by Allay Lamp.